Feline Filibuster

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Feline Filibuster
Chapter60 of 127 (list of chapters)
PublishedNovember 24, 2010 (2010-11-24)
Page count18
Major charactersSue, Paulo, Jasmine, Abbey, Daisy, Alec McCain, Tess
Minor charactersMike, Lucy, David, Rachel, Amaya, Katie
LocationsRoseville High School
Collected inVolume Three, Omnibus 1
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← RehearsalPillow Talk →
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Election season hits Roseville High. Sue runs on real, achievable outcomes, Jasmine's ticket promises to ban detention, and Abbey runs on expelling every bully in the building. So naturally, the winner is Daisy, who only joined halfway through the debate.

Synopsis

The race starts in the Roseville High School computer lab, where Paulo prints off a thick stack of campaign posters for Jasmine.[1] At lunch, Sue slams into the cafeteria with McCain in tow to announce her own run for student council secretary.[2] Paulo and Jasmine burst in moments later as the rival ticket.[3]

Neither campaign gets through lunch intact. Paulo's promises of candy bars and banned detention wilt under McCain's fact-checking,[4] and Sue's modest, achievable platform empties the room.[5] Then Sue drops the real bomb: only sophomores can run for secretary, and Jasmine is a freshman. Paulo typed every poster, and Jasmine lets him know it: "IT'S ALL OVER THE SCHOOL!! 300 sheets of WRONG, Paulo!!"[6]

Jasmine flails her arms so fast she appears to have four of them, screaming "300 sheets of WRONG, Paulo!!" at a cringing Paulo.
Paulo remembers what grade his girlfriend is in, 300 sheets too late.

While Paulo hand-corrects every poster to "TREASURY", Sue lets Lucy in on her bigger plan: a puppet council with herself as secretary and a senior as figurehead president.[7] Her pick for president, Tess, refuses flat out: "THE SCHOOL HATES ME."[8] Worse, Abbey enters the race against Sue rather than beside her.[9]

The secretaries' debate is where the race gets ugly. Asked about school bullying, Abbey answers with one word: expulsion.[10] He reads a broken-windows speech off a sheet Daisy hands him, while flashbacks show a bully named Noah shoving Tess into the lockers.[11] Sue brands the whole platform a fascist dictatorship.[12]

That word is one insult too many. Abbey slams his fists down and screams "BULLIES SHOULD ROT IN HELL!!" The room falls silent, apart from Paulo's helpful "Hit her!"[13] Daisy calms him with a stress ball and takes over his podium, "temporarily".[14]

The speech does quieter damage in the audience. Lucy had blown her nose on Mike's scarf at lunch, business as usual for those two.[2] As Abbey rails on about bullies and abuse, Mike turns a judgmental frown on her. Lucy goes white and won't look at him.[12]

In the end, Daisy wins in a landslide, leaving Sue face-down under the caption DEFEATED.[15] The "WHAT REALLY HAPPENED" flashback shows Paulo, grimly ordering student after student to vote for her.[16] Then Daisy gives the job away to Abbey, citing her eighteen other extracurriculars. He smiles thinly: "Heh heh heh.. Just according to plan.."[17]

As secretary, Abbey declares a lunchtime trash-pickup day for orange cats, which lands squarely on Paulo.[18] Treasurer-elect Jasmine gets him back: she converts the bake sale money into thousands of pennies and delivers them to Abbey's locker.[18]

Critical moments

Abbey smiles thinly against a green background, saying "Heh heh heh.. Just according to plan..".
Roseville High's incoming secretary, everybody.
  • Sue reveals that only sophomores can run for secretary, voiding Jasmine's campaign and all 300 of Paulo's posters. Jasmine switches to the treasurer's race.[6][7]
  • Sue's "fascist" jab breaks Abbey's temper mid-debate: he screams that bullies should rot in hell, and Daisy has to defuse him with a stress ball.[13][14]
  • Mid-debate, Abbey's speech about abuse lands somewhere unintended: Mike turns a judgmental frown on Lucy, who goes white and looks away.[12]
  • Daisy wins the election (Paulo strong-armed voters one at a time) and hands the seat to Abbey, who calls it "Just according to plan.."[16][17]

Character dynamics

  • Mike and Lucy: Lucy's rough treatment of Mike, scarf-as-handkerchief included, passes as normal between them.[2] Abbey's tirade recasts it as something uglier: Mike frowns at her across the auditorium, and she can't meet his eyes.[12] The chill carries straight into Pillow Talk, where he ignores her on her own birthday.[19]
  • Sue and Abbey: Sue greets Abbey as an assumed campaign ally and gets a rival instead.[9] By mid-debate she's calling his platform fascist and he's screaming at her.[12][13] Watching him land the seat anyway horrifies her all over again.[17]

Trivia & observations

  • The title was a beta-title from Oliver, who scripted the first six or so pages; Veronica's working title was "Elections".[1]
  • A post on the authors' Tumblr sets the chapter in late 2007, between Halloween and Lucy's birthday — hence David's "running for Obama?" crack.[3][20]
  • Lucy using Mike's scarf as a tissue revives the running gag from Wardrobe Malfunction ("How nostalgic!", per Veronica).[2][21]

Related chapters

  • Pillow Talk: the direct payoff, in the very next chapter: Mike openly ignores Lucy on her birthday.
  • Under Pressure: the source of Abbey's debate flashback; Noah corners Tess and Abbey drives him off.
  • A Different Side: the pep rally where the school booed Tess on stage, context for "THE SCHOOL HATES ME."

References

  1. ↑ 1.0 1.1 Chapter 60: Feline Filibuster, page 1
  2. ↑ 2.0 2.1 2.2 2.3 Chapter 60: Feline Filibuster, page 2
  3. ↑ 3.0 3.1 Chapter 60: Feline Filibuster, page 3
  4. ↑ Chapter 60: Feline Filibuster, page 4
  5. ↑ Chapter 60: Feline Filibuster, page 5
  6. ↑ 6.0 6.1 Chapter 60: Feline Filibuster, page 6
  7. ↑ 7.0 7.1 Chapter 60: Feline Filibuster, page 7
  8. ↑ Chapter 60: Feline Filibuster, page 8
  9. ↑ 9.0 9.1 Chapter 60: Feline Filibuster, page 9
  10. ↑ Chapter 60: Feline Filibuster, page 10
  11. ↑ Chapter 60: Feline Filibuster, page 11
  12. ↑ 12.0 12.1 12.2 12.3 12.4 Chapter 60: Feline Filibuster, page 12
  13. ↑ 13.0 13.1 13.2 Chapter 60: Feline Filibuster, page 13
  14. ↑ 14.0 14.1 Chapter 60: Feline Filibuster, page 14
  15. ↑ Chapter 60: Feline Filibuster, page 15
  16. ↑ 16.0 16.1 Chapter 60: Feline Filibuster, page 16
  17. ↑ 17.0 17.1 17.2 Chapter 60: Feline Filibuster, page 17
  18. ↑ 18.0 18.1 Chapter 60: Feline Filibuster, page 18
  19. ↑ Chapter 61: Pillow Talk, page 3
  20. ↑ . 2017-03-22 https://bittersweetcandybowl.tumblr.com/post/158720061474. {{cite web}}: Missing or empty |title= (help)
  21. ↑ Chapter 24: Wardrobe Malfunction, page 1
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